Rules for Perfection

It's good to have classroom rules.
These are pretty basic rules; these are my rules:

1. No pincushioning. IF you even think about pincushioning, you will be immediately dropped from the school.
2. No breath-mint/gum wrappers in clothing in such a way that it resembles a gun or a medieval weapon of any kind. This will not be tolerated.
3. Always show up with a grin. Not a smile or a blank face or a slept on the porch with a dead dog face but a GRIN.
4. No one shall use the phrase “gesticulate” without a good reason. Like an assignment from the principle.
5. Raise your hand before movement.
6. NO POACHING
7. NO JOKING ABOUT POACHING
8. No opening other people’s mail. This rule does not extend to your personal life.
9. Squandering of sudden wealth will not be accepted.
10. IF you show up late to class, you will be expected to do sit-ups until you vomit or pass out in fear.
11. Do Handstands during tests.
12. Don’t bring gross crackers for lunch.